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Reading the End Bookcast, BONUS: The Princess Switch

Christmas celebrators amongst us, I hope you had a wonderful day yesterday! Today is the day for reading books and relaxing and perhaps listening to podcasts? In service of that end, the Jennys bring you a bonus episode in which we watch the Netflix original movie The Princess Switch and recap every glorious moment of it for you. Enjoy!

Bonus Episode 5

Thanks so much to our Patreon subscribers for making this possible!

Get at me on Twitter, email the podcast, and friend me (Gin Jenny) and Whiskey Jenny on Goodreads. If you like what we do, support us on Patreon. Or if you wish, you can find us on iTunes (and if you enjoy the podcast, give us a good rating! We appreciate it very very much).

Credits
Producer: Captain Hammer
Photo credit: The Illustrious Annalee
Theme song by: Jessie Barbour
Transcripts by: Sharon of Library Hungry

Transcript is available under the jump!

THEME SONG: [WITH JINGLE BELLS] You don’t judge a book by its cover. Page one’s not a much better view. And shortly you’re gonna discover the middle won’t mollify you. So whether whiskey’s your go-to or you’re like my gin-drinking friend, no matter what you are imbibing, you’ll be better off in the end reading the end.

WHISKEY JENNY: Hello! And welcome to a special holiday bonus episode for the Reading the End Bookcast with the demographically similar Jennys. I’m Whiskey Jenny.

GIN JENNY: And I’m Gin Jenny.

WHISKEY JENNY: And we are here to talk about Netflix’s seminal film, The Princess Switch. [LAUGHTER] We’re going to get into it but first, Gin Jenny, as always, what are you reading right now?

GIN JENNY: I am rereading In Other Lands, by Sarah Rees Brennan, which someone described as if the Narnia books were written from Eustace Clarence Scrubb’s perspective. So it’s about this kid from the regular world who gets invited into a fantasy world and to go to school there and stuff. And when he gets there, he just finds everything ridiculous. He’s like, oh, you’re training us to be child soldiers and fight in a war? Sounds really appropriate.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Great point.

GIN JENNY: Yeah. So it’s really charming, and it kind of plays with a lot of the tropes of that kind of fantasy novel. And it’s really sweet and has a happy ending. Not to spoil too much, but it has a happy ending. And I like it a lot. What are you reading?

WHISKEY JENNY: I am reading Good and Mad, by Rebecca Traister.

GIN JENNY: Oh, how is that?

WHISKEY JENNY: I’m actually enjoying it so far. It’s for book club that I’m in with Friend of the Podcast Ashley.

GIN JENNY: And look at you reading a nonfiction book.

WHISKEY JENNY: I know. Thank you very much. I was a little trepidatious, A, because it’s nonfiction. And B, I don’t have a lot of experience with Rebecca Traister. I know a lot of people love her, but I was worried it was going to be all about white feminism.

GIN JENNY: Sure.

WHISKEY JENNY: So far it’s really not. I think she’s doing—I mean, I haven’t finished it yet, but so far it seems pretty intersectional. So I’m excited about that. And yeah, I’m finding it to be very readable, and she’s making a lot of good points. It’s not perfect so far. She does a lot of—and I think Ashley has pointed this out to me when we’re talking about it in bars, too—but she does a lot of hedging, and she’ll be like, maybe it’s because of this. Or, “some people say.” And you’re like, you have to either have an opinion on it, or you have to back it up by fact. You can’t be there in the middle. But I think she is making a lot of great points and a lot of really interesting connections, and it’s making me both angry and knowledgeable, I think, so that’s good.

GIN JENNY: Awesome.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well, do you want to talk about The Princess Switch? Should we get into that other work of feminist manifesto?

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yes, I would love to. I should also note for our listeners that Whiskey Jenny said, what if we watched a Christmas movie, one of the holiday movies for our bonus episode? And I was like, what if it was The Princess Switch? And she was like, great, that’s the one I wanted to do anyway.

WHISKEY JENNY: It worked out perfectly.

GIN JENNY: It does. So do you want to say what the premise of this extremely sensible and reasonable movie is?

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, absolutely. So Vanessa Hudgens is a baker in Chicago, which you know because she wears a hat that says Chicago on it. [LAUGHTER] She is a baker, and she and her best friend slash sous chef, Kevin—

GIN JENNY: Played by Nick Sagar.

WHISKEY JENNY: Conveniently extremely attractive—and his daughter all go to the fictional European royalty of Belgravia for a baking competition. While they are there, Chicago Vanessa Hudgens runs into the fiancee of the prince of Belgravia, who looks exactly like her, and they switch places.

GIN JENNY: Yup. And that’s the movie.

WHISKEY JENNY: And that’s the movie.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Well, before we get into recapping it, what did you think overall?

WHISKEY JENNY: I will say overall, I didn’t love it as much as I wanted to.

GIN JENNY: Kind of me too. Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: It sort of didn’t—it had some charming parts, and I knew it was going to be ridiculous, and it was. I had more trouble turning my brain off, and it just wasn’t really more than the sum of its parts to me.

GIN JENNY: Yes, I felt the same way. I thought either it should have been more bonkers or better at what it was doing.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: I would have loved if it was better, yeah.

GIN JENNY: But I mean, I would have accepted this level of quality, but more bonkers plotting.

WHISKEY JENNY: Absolutely, yeah. I mean, I think they actually missed a lot of comedic moments. They didn’t really play into the comedy of switching places. They only had one mishap where they almost ran into each other.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, which led to nothing. And I feel like a lot of the plot points that come up also lead to nothing.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, totally. I totally agree. So OK, well I’m glad we’re on the same page, because I’m worried I was going to be bringing this podcast down, but now we can both—

GIN JENNY: Me, too.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: —address it with the critical eye that it deserves. [LAUGHTER] I mean, I will say that I still had a good time.

GIN JENNY: Oh yeah, no. That’s what I was going to say. I enjoyed watching it. I don’t think I would watch it again another Christmas, you know? But it was fun.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. I did rewatch the other royalty Netflix A Royal Wedding? No. A Royal Christmas Prince?

GIN JENNY: The Christmas Prince.

WHISKEY JENNY: A Prince for Christmas? The Christmas Prince?

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: That one I felt—to compare it to that, that one I am willing to rewatch this Christmas.

GIN JENNY: Are you going to watch the sequel, Christmas Prince Two?

WHISKEY JENNY: You bet I am, yeah. [LAUGHTER] For some reason that one just worked more for me. I don’t know.

GIN JENNY: Well, I did think it was hilariously ridiculous that in—well, we’ll get to it. We’ll get to it. Let’s just say there’s cross pollination in the Netflix universe. So the movie opens with Vanessa Hudgens number one, who I’m going to call Vanessa Fudgens, at her bakery. And she—

WHISKEY JENNY: Wait, so sorry. Are we calling her Vanessa Fudgens because she’s the bakery version?

GIN JENNY: Yes, I am.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK, do you have a pun for the royal version?

GIN JENNY: No, I don’t. I really tried to think of one, but I couldn’t.

WHISKEY JENNY: Aw!

GIN JENNY: I know, I know. I’m really sorry. I did my best, but I just called her Duchess Hudgens, because I couldn’t think of a pun. I’m sorry.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK. Duchessa.

GIN JENNY: I know, I thought of that. And was like, naw, come on, Gin Jenny. [LAUGHTER] You’re better than this.

WHISKEY JENNY: No. I’m not.

GIN JENNY: Apparently I’m not, either.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK, sorry.

GIN JENNY: So Vanessa Fudgens has been entered by her sous chef into this baking competition in Belgravia. But she’s like, oh, I don’t want to go. I can’t leave Chicago during the busy season, or whatever whatever. But she decides to go after all. So that whole—

WHISKEY JENNY: Can I just point out that that is an extremely reasonable qualm to have when you’re running a small business that’s retail and probably dependent on a lot of your holiday sales? [LAUGHTER] To just randomly close up, and Kevin’s like, ugh, you’re no fun!

GIN JENNY: Yes! That’s the thing! Kevin and the little daughter—what’s the daughter’s name?

WHISKEY JENNY: Olivia.

GIN JENNY: Olivia. Olivia. Kevin and Olivia are both like, oh, she won’t try new things. She’s so staid. And it’s like, well OK, but yeah, the point that you made is really valid, Whiskey Jenny.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: And that’s going to be a recurring theme for me, my problem with Kevin being like, boo, you’re no fun. So get strapped in.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yeah. Yeah, I agree. But anyway, she eventually decides—she runs into her ex. And oh, this was another thing. So she says no to the baking competition. And then she’s out and about and she runs into her ex with his new girlfriend, and that decides her that she needs to move on from him and do this baking competition. But the new girlfriend has never heard her name before? Even though it seems like she was in a pretty serious relationship with Paul, and his new relationship is serious enough that they’re meeting families. So like, what’s going on there?

WHISKEY JENNY: I think we’re meant to believe that it was serious for Vanessa Fudgens, but not serious for Paul.

GIN JENNY: I just don’t think it could be so unserious that his new girlfriend would not be aware that he had recently gotten out of at least a—

WHISKEY JENNY: Was it that recent, also?

GIN JENNY: I don’t know. Yeah, you’re right, I don’t know. It’s not clear. But still, I found that a little shady.

WHISKEY JENNY: Sure, no, that is shady. Also shady, that all you have to submit to this baking competition is a photo and a recipe.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: And somehow they choose the best chefs from around the world. But anyway, she decides to go, so she and Kevin—this is the other thing. Kevin insists on her doing this but then doesn’t offer to take over the bakery while she’s gone? No arrangements are made for the bakery while she’s gone.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well, he has to go with her to do the competition.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I guess. But still, it’s kind of weird.

WHISKEY JENNY: No, I agree. Yeah.

GIN JENNY: Anyway, they go to the competition. And there’s a mean girl there. This is another one of those plots that leads absolutely nowhere.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well—OK, sure.

GIN JENNY: I mean—anyway, we’ll get to it. Because I had some notes about the baking competition.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh yeah. Whoa yeah.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: So there’s a mean girl at the competition who is apparently Vanessa Fudgens’s nemesis from culinary school, and they’re still mad at each other.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, also Vanessa Hudgens—I mean, I don’t know how old they were when they were in culinary school, but Vanessa Fudgens is really mean to this girl and alleges that she sleeps with professors. Like, is that why you’re mad at her?

GIN JENNY: I know! She’s such a Vanessa Judgens about it. I was really pissed at her for that.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh! Vanessa Judgens! Nice. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, either they’re 19 and that professor should not have been sleeping with her, or they’re like 25 and it was a perfectly consensual relationship between two adults. Either way it’s weird that Vanessa Fudgens is—

GIN JENNY: Still mad about it.

WHISKEY JENNY: —shaming her for it.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, no, I totally agree. I wrote, “Vanessa Judgens slash Grudgens slut shames her.” And I actually think the mean girl is perfectly justified in spilling sauce on Vanessa Fudgens’s apron. I think she deserves it.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I’m not mad about the sauce thing.

GIN JENNY: So then she has to go fix her apron and she bumps into none other than—who?

WHISKEY JENNY: The Duchess of another fake country. [LAUGHTER] Uh, the Duchess of—

GIN JENNY: Montenaro.

WHISKEY JENNY: Montenaro. Thank you. Who conveniently no one knows what she looks like.

GIN JENNY: Right, because she’s a recluse.

WHISKEY JENNY: Because she’s, quote, camera shy. [LAUGHTER] And it turns out they’re identical twins! Except they’re long lost cousins, but they look exactly alike.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, this is really not adequately explained. Someone’s like, oh supposedly someone from this family line went to America one time, so that explains it.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I was fine with that, strangely. I was like, yeah, OK, sure. Distantly related, moving on.

GIN JENNY: OK. All right. All right, that’s fine. And then what happens?

WHISKEY JENNY: Then the princess girl—or she’s not a princess yet I guess. She’s a duchess.

GIN JENNY: Duchess, yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: The duchess girl, you can tell she’s already hatching a plot. But she invites Vanessa Fudgens to the castle to have a wedding cake consult, but says Vanessa Fudgens can’t tell anyone. Then she goes there and proposes that they switch, right? There’s nothing else in between.

GIN JENNY: No, there’s nothing. She’s like, I want to be an ordinary girl for two days, so let’s just switch places.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah.

GIN JENNY: And then they have a fun montage where they’re practicing to be each other. I admit, I enjoyed that a lot.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, totally. And in general one of my notes is that I think Vanessa Hudgens is way more charming than this movie showcases.

GIN JENNY: Agreed, yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: A couple of those scenes you get glimpses of it, like when they’re pretending to be each other and learning each other’s walks and mannerisms. And it’s really cute, I agree.

GIN JENNY: It’s cute. Yeah, I was into it. I also think it’s very funny that they stole a page from The Parent Trap’s book and had a secret handshake that Duchess Hudgens has to learn to do with Olivia, the little girl.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, was that from The Parent Trap?

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, cute.

GIN JENNY: Oh, I forgot to say this. The reason that Vanessa Fudgens agrees to this insane plan is that Olivia, the little girl, has expressed a passing interest in some ballet school that Belgravia offers. It’s a strange thing. But anyway, Vanessa Fudgens is like, no, I must get her this, it’s her dream. And so she makes Duchess Hudgens promise to sponsor Olivia to go to this ballet school next summer, or something.

WHISKEY JENNY: The ethics of which we can explore later. [LAUGHTER] Like, what if she’s not a good ballet person?

GIN JENNY: She’s not pulling strings to get her in, she’s just paying for her, right?

WHISKEY JENNY: I thought she was pulling strings to get her in.

GIN JENNY: Oh, that is pretty shady, if so. I thought she was just funding it. I thought it was like a scholarship.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK, so like, you get in on your own merit and then I’ll pay for it.

GIN JENNY: That’s what I was thinking.

WHISKEY JENNY: That’s fine, I guess. Yeah. I do have a couple more notes on our first glimpse of the princess, as well. The duchess.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: And her terrible hair? Go on.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, number one, I hate her hair as that person.

GIN JENNY: I hate it too. And they change Vanessa Fudgens’s hair to be more like the duchess’s hair, which is such a mistake.

WHISKEY JENNY: I want to be clear, I don’t mind the short hair, and I think when it’s styled for Vanessa Fudgens, it’s super cute. But when they style the short hair for the duchess—

GIN JENNY: And tucked behind her ears, with a very severe—

WHISKEY JENNY: Very severe, and then it flips out. I just do not like it at all.

GIN JENNY: I hated it. I hate it. And Vanessa—I’ve forgotten how to say her real name. Vanessa Hudgens is really cute, and it’s very unflattering to her face.

WHISKEY JENNY: It’s terrible. The other thing I want to note is that she does an accent. I’m not going to call it any specific accent, I’m just going to say she does an accent as the duchess.

GIN JENNY: Yep.

WHISKEY JENNY: So I looked it up. Obviously the guy who plays the prince is Sam Palladio, so he’s English.

GIN JENNY: OK.

WHISKEY JENNY: The guy who plays Kevin is British.

GIN JENNY: [LAUGHTER] OK.

WHISKEY JENNY: Girl who plays Olivia—which I also was like, hm, something’s off here—is also British. But I’ll give her more of a pass on her American accent because, you know, she’s a child.

GIN JENNY: She’s a child, yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: But do you think they all just melted into puddles every time she tried to do that accent? Do you think they’re all like, oh, ugh, oh, can we—oh, god! Or do you think they were giving her pointers and stuff?

GIN JENNY: Probably the first one. Because she seems adorable and charming, so I’m sure they were like, this is so cute. Who cares about the quality of this movie? Not everyone involved in it, clearly.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: We’ll just let it slide. You’re right.

GIN JENNY: So yeah, they do the switch.

WHISKEY JENNY: They do the switch. Oh, and another thing I would like to mention is that in convincing Vanessa Fudgens of the switch she’s like, oh, it’ll be fine. There’s relatively nothing on my schedule except for [EMPHASIS] a meeting with the king and queen! [LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: But that’s nothing.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yeah, it’s a pretty big deal. And Vanessa Fudgens really bombs that meeting, so.

WHISKEY JENNY: She also lies. That’s not the only thing, but even if that was, that is a very large thing for Vanessa Fudgens to have to fake.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I agree. Especially if the king and queen have spent time with Duchess Hudgens in the past.

WHISKEY JENNY: Which it sounds like they have not. It sounds like no one has, which is why I believe the switch that direction more.

GIN JENNY: OK.

WHISKEY JENNY: I was, however, when they first proposed the switch I was—and this is another instance of where I could not turn my brain off—but I was really concerned for the contest and Vanessa Fudgens’s baking career. I was like, Lady Margaret doesn’t know how to bake. How is she going to compete in the competition for her? They didn’t lay out the rules of when it was going to end quick enough for me to be like, but, but, but the whole reason she’s here is the competition. You can’t just bail on the competition! And then by the time they were like, OK, it’ll be in two days and you can come to the competition again, I was like, well, now you tell me.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, that seems like a top priority. Although to be fair, Vanessa Fudgens is not that committed to this competition, you know?

WHISKEY JENNY: I mean, allegedly she is, because she is such a planner. But.

GIN JENNY: Yeah. So do you want to do one side of the switch first and then the other side of the switch? Instead of going back and forth.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, yeah. Which one do you want to start with?

GIN JENNY: I would like to start with Vanessa Fudgens and the prince, because I hate them more.

WHISKEY JENNY: Really?

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: I hated them less.

GIN JENNY: Oh, interesting. I think the reason that I disliked this plotline more is that Vanessa Fudgens is a very bad liar. Well, she just makes up incredibly extravagant, elaborate lies for no reason every time she’s in contact with the prince, and it makes no sense. Like she’s hanging out in her room trying on hats and Prince Edward comes by. And she’s like, [ACCENT] oh, in Montenaro we always take tea in hats. And she makes up all this stuff. It is so unnecessary. She could just be like, I was just trying on hats, and now I have a hat on my head.

WHISKEY JENNY: See, I found that really amusing, though.

GIN JENNY: OK.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: It endeared her to me.

GIN JENNY: Well, I did like that she just made up huge, huge, huge lies. It was unnecessary, but I liked that she just went all in.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. Like when they’re at breakfast with the king and queen talking about peanut allergies, she just says, oh, that guy died, we don’t have to worry about it. [LAUGHTER] Which is a pretty big lie!

GIN JENNY: Yeah!

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: No, for some reason I found that charming.

GIN JENNY: I think the reason it stressed me out is because the prince keeps proposing things to do or talk about, and instead of being like, no, I don’t feel like it, she’s just like, OK sure, and then just makes up crazy lies. Like he asks her if she wants to go riding. And instead of just—again, instead of just saying I don’t feel like going riding right now, let’s go on a walk instead, she does this thing she’s completely unqualified to do, and it will be obvious she’s unqualified to do it. The prince is like, aren’t you a competitive rider? And she’s like, yeah, totally.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, but when she was talking about how they have heated stables in Montenaro, I legitimately giggled at that exchange. I found it to be a very funny exchange.

GIN JENNY: I did too. I wrote down, [ACCENT] “a warm horse is a happy horse.”

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: So I like that it gave us the backdrop for those sort of comedic moments. I mean, I get what you’re saying. She’s not doing a great job of hiding it. Although these people don’t really know her, so she doesn’t have as much of a—

GIN JENNY: But that’s what I’m saying! Her task is easy, yet she does it so ridiculously.

WHISKEY JENNY: Sure. No, you’re not wrong. But I’m not as mad at the surrounding people for not being suspicious as I am mad at Kevin.

GIN JENNY: But anyway, the prince tells her not to worry her pretty head about politics, and she gets pissed off.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, legitimately.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, no, I think so too.

WHISKEY JENNY: And I really like that the plotline between them is that she doesn’t have to be like, you’re right, I should dampen down, my apologies. No. He comes to apologize to her and is like, I always want to hear what you have to say, and then they carry on. It’s not a compromise in the middle. So I actually really appreciated that.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, no, that was good.

WHISKEY JENNY: And as much as I am annoyed at Kevin for always being like, oh you’re no fun, I appreciated that the movie was, it’s not that she’s no fun, it’s just that she had to find the right person, and Kevin is not her romantic partner. She doesn’t have to change. So I liked that.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I liked that, too. Later in the movie, there’s this whole plotline about visiting the children’s shelter that the prince’s family financially supports. And it’s kind of weird, because Vanessa Fudgens is like, oh, you should go there and actually meet the kids. And he’s like, wow, I never thought of doing a photo op. This is a brand new idea that has never occurred to me before.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yes, I totally agree. I wrote that down. “It’s never been done before!” is literally what he says.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Like, where are their people? Hire a publicist!

WHISKEY JENNY: It definitely has been done before, buddy.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: And then I was annoyed because they go to the orphanage or whatever, children’s shelter, and Vanessa Fudgens reads to the kids. And she clearly has no idea how to read to children. She reads the words on the page and then turns the book to face the children. You are supposed to hold the book up to shoulder level, open so the kids can see the pictures, and lean your head around to read the words at the same time.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well, there you go.

GIN JENNY: Well, she has a little niece that she presumably has had a chance to learn this.

WHISKEY JENNY: Have we done the ball already? Have they gone to the ball?

GIN JENNY: Oh, god, I completely forgot about the ball. Yeah, there’s a ball. She doesn’t know how to play piano, but they insist that she plays piano, and they’re fooled by her playing four notes while the prince does a really complicated duet.

WHISKEY JENNY: I think it’s because he covers for her and says—see, this is so interesting. We had exact opposite reactions. That was one of my legitimate favorite moments, because I don’t think a duet on piano as a flirtatious romantic thing is not a traditional trope in the Christmas movies, so I found it delightful and original. And he has to reach around her to play a really low note, and I thought that was so cute and adorable.

GIN JENNY: That part was cute. No, that part was cute. And also, I will say, I liked it that after the piano thing, she’s out in the pavilion and he comes to talk with her. And she’s like, I’m nervous about dancing, I haven’t danced in a while. So he practices with her. And I thought that was sweet. And they do it to “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear,” and “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear” is one of my very favorite Christmas songs.

WHISKEY JENNY: It’s so pretty!

GIN JENNY: It’s so beautiful. And so that part was really nice. It wasn’t beautiful enough of a Christmas carol that I would kiss Prince Edward, because he is so boring. But that was a nice moment.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I think Sam Palladio also is more charming than this movie gives him room to be. Because you got some flashes of it when he does certain things. But yeah, I really enjoyed the duet. And I enjoyed that he—the cover for it is that she had stage fright, and so he steps in to help her out. And I thought that was really sweet. And it’s sort of an explanation for why she couldn’t do anything.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, stage fright works. That’s a pretty good cover. That’s OK, I’ll accept that.

WHISKEY JENNY: While we’re on music, Sam Palladio is on—I don’t know if I’m saying his name right, so I’m sorry if I’m not—but he was on Nashville. I’m pretty sure he can sing, because I think he sings a song for this movie. And obviously Vanessa Hudgens can sing. Why did they not sing ever?

GIN JENNY: That is a great point! I did not know he was on Nashville, but now that you’ve told me, I’m very upset.

WHISKEY JENNY: Right? Come on!

GIN JENNY: Yeah! You know what they could have done is—

WHISKEY JENNY: Do a duet at the wedding!

GIN JENNY: Number one, do a duet at the wedding. Number two, they could have done that instead of the piano thing. Like they could have started out doing a little thing, and then she could have started singing along with it. And he’s like, oh singing along is fun, and then they could have sung together. And then someone else could’ve taken over the piano, and they could have gotten up and sung the song. I just have a vision, and I like the vision that I’ve just come up with.

WHISKEY JENNY: No, it’s beautiful. As long as we can still get the reach around for the low note.

GIN JENNY: Yes, you can do that. Because it would happen at the intro part of the song.

WHISKEY JENNY: No, it was at the end.

GIN JENNY: Yes, but it doesn’t have to be.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, OK. Got it. [LAUGHTER] You’re right. I’m on board now, yes. OK, great.

GIN JENNY: OK. Cool, cool. Great, awesome. See, and this is another thing. After they read to the children at the orphanage, they decide they’re going to buy toys for the kids at the orphanage—another thing that, although this orphanage has sponsorship from the royal family, they don’t have enough money for and the royal family has never thought of before.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. No.

GIN JENNY: But whatever. So they go to buy some toys. And I really wanted there to be more of a toy shopping montage.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, real missed opportunity for a montage, but they do play Twister, which is amazing.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, Twister is fun. She’s wearing a short skirt, so it’s not the game that I would choose to play on a date. But still, it’s cute.

WHISKEY JENNY: No, that’s true. And it is really—I feel like there’s also a lot of missed opportunities for the comedy between people brought up as royals and people brought up as normals. Because Vanessa Hudgens is like, ooh, Twister! And he’s trying to play along, and he’s like, ooh, it’s a mat with different colored circles! [LAUGHTER] Yay! [LAUGHTER] It was legitimately funny.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I liked that, too.

WHISKEY JENNY: And they just didn’t play that a lot. And they have two pairings where they could have played it.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, and we’ll get to it, but the ways that they do it with Duchess Hudgens are, to me, very silly.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. They’re dumb and not funny. Yeah.

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: This whole buying gifts and wrapping them for the children—I just thought it was really sweet when Fred—who I would like to get to after this, who is the prince’s, I don’t know, secretary?

GIN JENNY: Or something, yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: —slash driver? Or whatever.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Who cares?

WHISKEY JENNY: He’s like, well that doesn’t seem very dignified, Your Highness. And the prince says it’s always dignified to be kind. And I just thought that was a really lovely line and phrasing. When they leave the shelter and she’s really excited that he’s agreed to her plan of buying them presents, she jumps into his arms, but then is like, oh sorry, that was very dignified. And he’s like, that’s all right. I quite liked it.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yeah, that was cute.

WHISKEY JENNY: It was really cute, yeah.

GIN JENNY: I just felt like I would have been so much more invested in their relationship if we had had a montage of them buying toys and playing around and being silly in the toy store, and then a montage of them wrapping presents, and running into problems wrapping presents. And as a montage, it wouldn’t have to take up that much time. But you could see the prince messing up a little bit, and putting a bow on Vanessa Fudgens’s forehead and stuff like that.

WHISKEY JENNY: Absolutely. Absolutely agreed, yeah. Oh, you know what? I forgot to mention one thing that happened at the ball, also. They accidentally stop under the mistletoe.

GIN JENNY: Oh yeah. There’s two mistletoe incidents with Vanessa Fudgens and the prince.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, but Vanessa Fudgens—so she’s trying to give the prince a kiss on the cheek, but she’s way shorter than him. So that’s awkward at first. She has to stand up really far, and then he’s like, oh, what’s happening? Oh, OK, I should lean down. [LAUGHTER] And it was cute. I enjoyed it.

GIN JENNY: Again, I feel like there were missed opportunities here. Because I think one mistletoe moment would have been really charming. And also I think it should have been the one at the ball, but I think it should have happened at the end of the ball once they had these tender feelings for each other that have developed over the course of the ball. But instead they have two, one at the ball and one at the orphanage, so neither one feels particularly impactful to me.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. And they have the more steamy kiss in front of a bunch of children, which is an interesting choice.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yup, it’s strange. And also, I don’t feel like they have that much chemistry. And I think a montage just could have really helped with that.

WHISKEY JENNY: A montage always helps. Absolutely.

GIN JENNY: I love montages. I’m such montage trash.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK, can we talk about Fred now?

GIN JENNY: Yeah, because that whole thing was really weird. So Fred is the prince’s secretary or something.

WHISKEY JENNY: Slash bodyguard, slash chauffeur, slash advisor? I don’t know.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I can’t figure out what his role is. But he’s convinced that there’s something afoot.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well, and the King has told him, keep an eye on this girl. I think something’s afoot.

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: I was really on Fred’s side of this. Because—

GIN JENNY: Something is indeed afoot!

WHISKEY JENNY: Something is indeed afoot. If he is actually palace security, you have some holes that you need to plug up. This is a legitimate security concern that he should be concerned about.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yep.

WHISKEY JENNY: And then everyone keeps giving him menial tasks, which I felt like very enraging. I would be upset, too, if people kept handing me dishes and laundry if that was not in my job description, as I don’t think it is!

GIN JENNY: Yeah. I thought it was mean. And Fred is not—there’s no a priori reason for us to believe that Fred is terrible. He’s just completing an assignment he’s been given.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, he’s just trying to do his job!

GIN JENNY: Yeah. So if he doesn’t suck, they might as well just either let him in on the secret or be nice to him. Or, a third option, be better at lying.

WHISKEY JENNY: Sure. Yeah. And then he finds photos of the two of them together. So he’s like, aha, there’s two! That’s what was afoot! But I feel like he needs to research that further than just the photos, but that’s what he brings in his little file. And he only wants to talk to the king for some reason. And the queen threatens to fire him if he doesn’t give them to her, which I thought was kind of an intense—

GIN JENNY: Me too! If he’s loyal staff, what the heck?

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. Although it was weird that he only wanted to bring it to the king. Because it was the king who told him to be investigating! I don’t know. I felt really bad for Fred.

GIN JENNY: I felt kind of bad for Fred, too. Duchess Hudgens has a loyal retainer lady who is always—again, I feel like she could smooth things over with Fred if she wanted to, but she elects never to do that.

WHISKEY JENNY: No. She elects to antagonize him by handing him laundry.

GIN JENNY: Yeah. So it’s a choice. I don’t know. But anyway, so they do all this stuff, and Vanessa Fudgens is like, oh, you’re going to be such a great king. And the prince is like, I’ll only be a good king because I have you.

WHISKEY JENNY: And he also is sweet because he’s like—they haven’t met each other a lot because it’s a royal arranged situation. And he admits, I was really worried, but after spending these past couple of days with you and getting to know you better I’m not worried at all. I think we’re going to be great together.

That really sent me down a dark path of imagining the future in which they actually switch back, which is what their current plan is to do, is to switch back. And the prince is constantly trying to recapture that spark, but literally marries a different person than the person he fell in love with. And it would be a horrible, dark, suburban Jonathan Franzen novel where he’s like, what happened to our marriage? [LAUGHTER] It would be so depressing! And then Kevin, on the other hand, declares his love for his best friend, and then his best friend is, meh, no thanks. They’re constantly like, was I crazy? What happened?

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: It be Revolutionary Road, Belgravia.

WHISKEY JENNY: It would! And that just really threw me, because that’s their current plan, and I kind of couldn’t forgive them for that.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, that would be a horrible plan.

WHISKEY JENNY: It would be a horrible thing to do. So yeah, so I got really dark.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: You’re Dark Whiskey Jenny. I was just listening to Fangirl Happy Hour, and Ana has been calling herself Dark Ana, because she’s going through a hard time. Which I’m really sorry for, and I hope things get better for her soon. But I thought Dark Ana was extremely funny.

WHISKEY JENNY: I hope that, as well.

GIN JENNY: And the prince also gives Vanessa Fudgens his special family crest necklace.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah!

GIN JENNY: Like, you really will be an amazing queen, and I’m so excited that we’re partners and stuff. Which is, yeah, that’s nice.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, it was really sweet. And then later on, when they’ve switched back and the duchess is like, oh, I have to do my duty, the advisor secretary lady brings her that present. And she’s like, oh, the prince gave Vanessa Fudgens this, so now it’s yours. And it says truth, honor, and love. And then the lady says, funny thing, it doesn’t mention duty. Which I thought was a really clever thing to do.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I did too. Yeah, this is the other thing about their plan and the switching. There’s never any obstacle presented at all to why he has to marry the duchess and not someone else. I’m sure there’s reasons, but the movie doesn’t really go into that.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, other than just because princes marry other royalty.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, but no one even really says that explicitly. It’s just like, this is the arranged marriage. It’s not like Aladdin, where she’s supposed to pick someone of royal blood, and that’s the rule that her father has supplied. They don’t even give us a hand wavy reason why this would be a problem, which is strange. OK, well that’s all I had on Vanessa Fudgens.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I think I do too. And then at the end I’m going to have some general questions about them both.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, baking competition I have some stuff to discuss.

WHISKEY JENNY: So we’ll cover them both together when they come back together again. But yeah, let’s move on to the duchess and Kevin’s story.

GIN JENNY: OK, let me tell you the two reasons that I liked this one better.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK.

GIN JENNY: Number one, Kevin takes off his shirt at one point, and he looks great. So good job, Kevin.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh my god. [LAUGHTER] I was not expecting that. That dude is cut.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I was not, either. And he’s so mild mannered baker guy the whole movie long, but it just was a total surprise. And I didn’t really realize this was the kind of movie that was going to be female gazey, but I appreciated it.

WHISKEY JENNY: It was excellent, A of all.

GIN JENNY: Yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: Vanessa Hudgens as the Duchess is so cute and charming getting flustered by how sexy he is [LAUGHTER] which was really cute. So I watched this—I watched this twice, actually, because I watched it for the first time with my mom over Thanksgiving. And then we decided we were going to do it for podcast, so obviously I to do due diligence in watching again with a podcast eye. And he is so good looking and cut that it took me the second watch to realize that he’s asking to borrow her toothpaste, and they’ve been there for like three nights.

GIN JENNY: Here’s—let me hit you with a theory.

WHISKEY JENNY: OK, hit me.

GIN JENNY: He’s into her, and he’s trying to show off his abs.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, I like it.

GIN JENNY: That’s what I think.

WHISKEY JENNY: All right, cool. I’m in.

GIN JENNY: The other reason I liked this one better is because Duchess Hudgens pretending to be Vanessa Fudgens was very funny to me. Especially right off the bat when she’s talking to Kevin and he’s like, this is kind of weird. She says, I’m going to go catch some Zs, and she gives him finger guns.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: She does do the finger guns, yeah.

GIN JENNY: I’ve probably talked about this on this podcast before, but I constantly want to remember to start doing more finger guns, and I always forget about it. But every time I see someone doing finger guns, I’m like, yeah, I’m going to do that from now on.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, this is so interesting. I think we each liked the stories that we liked based on the strength or failure of Vanessa Hudgens’s charm during those scenes.

GIN JENNY: Yes. Oh yeah, I super agree.

WHISKEY JENNY: Which is fascinating, because I found her funnier as the normal girl pretending to be a princess, and you found her funnier this way. And that’s the one you like more, and that’s the one I like more.

GIN JENNY: Well, she did finger guns, so.

WHISKEY JENNY: She did do finger guns. That’s a strong argument. For sure.

GIN JENNY: But I do think that the Kevin plotline is less well developed in terms of their relationship. They go around and do some different activities, but I didn’t feel like it had as many nice romance moments as Vanessa Fudgens and the prince.

WHISKEY JENNY: I totally agree. And it just seems like they didn’t give the stories equal weight, which is strange to me. I don’t understand that choice.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, it is strange. Duchess Hudgens and Kevin and Olivia are just wandering around, seeing Santa, painting Christmas tree ornaments. They don’t get the most time to talk. There is a nice moment where a reporter—although I don’t think this would work and I think it’s nonsense. But there’s a moment when a reporter comes up to Duchess Hudgens and is like, oh, I want to do a profile of you as a baker. And she’s like, actually, you should profile my sous chef here. And the journalist is like, OK.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: OK a couple of things on this. That journalist was super hot and I was so distracted by him. [LAUGHTER] My notes say, “Excuse me, who was that handsome British journalist that we never hear from again?”

GIN JENNY: He should get his own movie!

WHISKEY JENNY: I was really into him. Yeah, let’s have a movie where he infiltrates some sort of a palace.

GIN JENNY: Great, great.

WHISKEY JENNY: So she’s like, well actually, Kevin’s a really important part of the team. You should talk to Kevin. And he was so shocked that she gave him any credit whatsoever that it made me mad at Vanessa Fudgens for never giving her sous chef any credit. He was like, wha? Thank you, that’s so kind. And I was like, you’re literally a part of the team.

GIN JENNY: I don’t really know. Obviously I don’t know how bakeries work, and I would lay even money that no one involved in the making of this movie knows how bakeries work.

WHISKEY JENNY: No one should take that bet. They definitely don’t know.

GIN JENNY: But I agree with you. And it was another thing that made me question, not so much the romance between Duchess Hudgens and Kevin, but the friendship between Vanessa Fudgens and Kevin. Because he’s like, oh, you’re such a drag all the time. And she apparently never gives him credit for anything. So what is the foundation of their friendship?

WHISKEY JENNY: I couldn’t agree more. Also he didn’t notice when his best friend literally became a different person.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I’d like to think that if you switched with a double I would notice.

WHISKEY JENNY: I am 100% certain that you would, and vice versa. You would just notice. And it wouldn’t be because I went around being like, I’ve never been in a toy store before.

GIN JENNY: We’ll come back to that, because yeah. But I feel like I would bring up inside jokes and your double would be like, I don’t get it. You know?

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, totally! You would notice if it was your best friend, as they repeatedly call each other.

GIN JENNY: It’s just crazy to me. And the fact that he never seems to bring up anything that trips her up. I feel like—you and I have been friends since, what, 2011? And we have a lot of stupid jokes in that time.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, totally.

GIN JENNY: It is just very unrealistic that over the course of these two days that they spend constantly in each other’s company that this never comes up. And also, as you say, the slips that she makes are so stupid.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. I think I would have liked it more if Kevin and Vanessa Fudgens weren’t as close. Because also, it made me feel more icky about this switch because he’s so close with Vanessa Fudgens. I was like, well, this is really not a cool thing to do to a person that’s that close to them.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, just tell him. Just tell him!

WHISKEY JENNY: Really weird and gross, and he is kissing you under false pretenses, and it just icked me out more than it did with someone you don’t know.

GIN JENNY: I couldn’t agree more. I think it would have made perfect sense if she and the sous chef—like if she were very close to Olivia, because Olivia figures it out immediately.

WHISKEY JENNY: Which I loved. The child is like, uh, it’s obvious.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I liked that, too. But I think that it would have made more sense plotwise, and also made me feel less gross, if they weren’t so much best friends as they were co-workers, but she had become very close to the kid over the course of the years. That would’ve been fine.

WHISKEY JENNY: Absolutely. Totally agree. And it doesn’t change the story at all.

GIN JENNY: Right, yeah!

WHISKEY JENNY: There’s also a moment later on when they’re having their emotional climax—this is just at a point where I question their friendship. Duchess Hudgens says something like—basically she’s like, I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you over these past couple of days. And he’s like, that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me. [LAUGHTER] Or she says friendship is what it’s all about, or something like that. It’s not an over-the-top compliment. It’s just like, you’re my friend and I appreciate you. And he drops to the floor in surprise. Do you guys never say nice things to each other?

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Which, again, is so not resonant with my experience of friendship. I feel like I have recapped with you how much I liked having you visit in September like 25 times.

WHISKEY JENNY: We both have. It’s just been all caps, OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN! [LAUGHTER] Hey remember when that fun thing happened?

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, Whiskey Jenny.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: If that were true, I’m so sorry!

GIN JENNY: Oh my god, it’s ridiculous. And also, on a more minor note, they sit down to watch a Christmas movie. And he’s like, which one do you want to watch, and Duchess Hudgens doesn’t know any Christmas movies. So she’s like, I don’t know, the one with Santa. And he says, they all have Santa. Which is, A, blatant lie, but B, they then choose a movie that doesn’t have Santa.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: They do not. But can we talk about the cross pollination now?

GIN JENNY: The cross pollination. Yes. Now is the moment. Yeah, what movie do they choose, Whiskey Jenny?

WHISKEY JENNY: They choose A Christmas Prince. [LAUGHTER] I was actually legit impressed by this. I thought it was very impressively done. It blew me away, actually.

GIN JENNY: Really?

WHISKEY JENNY: I thought it was pretty good product placement. No, I was into it. Yeah.

GIN JENNY: Oh my god, I was so like, come on Netflix, don’t insult me like this.

WHISKEY JENNY: No, I was really into it.

GIN JENNY: OK. All right, well, fair enough. And he also says it’s her favorite, which I question, again, because it only came out last year. It’s not her favorite yet.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, no, I agree. But then they do bring it back later. They bring back watching movies as their thing later, so it wasn’t just a random thing. Although he does say, we need to talk, and she’s like, let’s watch a movie. And he’s like, OK. That’s not how talking works, guys.

GIN JENNY: I do posit—this could explain everything. Maybe the reason they never say nice things to each other and don’t know each other that well is that all their time together is spent watching movies and doing nothing else, and not speaking.

WHISKEY JENNY: Watching A Christmas Prince?

GIN JENNY: Silently. In total silence.

WHISKEY JENNY: Sure. All right. Yeah.

GIN JENNY: Oh, and also I will say, in addition to being extremely cut, Kevin has very pretty eyelashes.

WHISKEY JENNY: Very pretty eyes in general, I would say, I would argue. No, I agree.

GIN JENNY: And he gives her a locket with a picture of him and Olivia and Santa and her. And I don’t know how he got that done so quickly in Belgravia, but whatever. And you know, they confess their feelings and they kiss. And I really judge Duchess Hudgens for kissing him.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. I mean, she does pull back and then be like, oh, we shouldn’t have done that. So at least they acknowledge it. But yeah, I agree.

GIN JENNY: That moment was set up and telegraphed, and she could have pulled the plug on it at any moment. But she didn’t.

WHISKEY JENNY: At any moment, yeah. Totally agreed.

GIN JENNY: Real shady.

WHISKEY JENNY: I do like that they had a snowball fight, as contractually obligated by any holiday movie.

GIN JENNY: Oh, me too. Yeah, yeah. And I believe The Christmas Prince also has a snowball fight, and I’m for it.

WHISKEY JENNY: They must. Oh, I just have one note. When they were in the square doing that snowball fight, the choir? The choir did not sound good.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: Oh, I didn’t even notice.

WHISKEY JENNY: It did not sound good. So then they switch back.

GIN JENNY: And then it’s baking computation time. And I think earlier in the movie this happened. Earlier in the movie, you see the mean girl baker sabotage Vanessa Fudgens’s equipment. She cuts the cord to the blender, I guess?

WHISKEY JENNY: No, to the mixer. To the mixer.

GIN JENNY: To the mixer?

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah.

GIN JENNY: Oh my god, that’s even stupider than I remembered.

WHISKEY JENNY: The part that really annoyed me about that is, that’s a show-provided mixer. Why would they not just give her another one? It’s not like she—I don’t know. Why is that like, you only get one mixer.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: And if you use it up, you’ve missed your shot!

WHISKEY JENNY: It’s not her personal mixer. I just thought that was so strange. I was like, the show would just give her another one. And also—

GIN JENNY: That was completely strange. Yeah, yes. Say the also.

WHISKEY JENNY: She makes an entire cake without that mixer. And then is like, at the very end, oh no, how do I puree the berries?

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: And then, in addition to not needing the mixer for anything but pureeing the berries for the filling, she’s like, oh well, I can do it by hand. And she just does it by hand and it’s no problem.

WHISKEY JENNY: Well, she does get a note from one of the judges. But yeah, she purees those berries, no problem, by hand.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, and Kevin’s like, oh, that’ll take a little longer. And she’s like, yeah, but oh well.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: That’ll be fine.

GIN JENNY: It’s so, so silly. And then she wins anyway. It’s not like anything comes of—nothing at all comes of the mean girl baker sabotaging her. Nothing.

WHISKEY JENNY: So they win the competition. And meanwhile, back at the palace, the queen has figured it out, because Fred gave her the photos. So the queen is like OK, you two, Duchess and Prince Edward, have to go present the awards at this baking competition. And Duchess Vanessa is like, OK, before we do that, Edward, I have to tell you something. And so Edward knows now.

And they show up at the baking competition, and then Vanessa Hudgens tries to hide. [LAUGHTER] On live TV. I really laughed at that, too. And she was like, you know Kevin, we could just go now, we could just go right now. Like right now! And Kevin’s like, you’re an insane person. We’re not doing that.

[LAUGHTER]

GIN JENNY: But then all is revealed, because they see these two identical women.

WHISKEY JENNY: I wasn’t sure that this movie was going to tell the two men. I thought maybe it was going to be like, let’s just stay switched. It’ll be fine. And I was very concerned about that.

GIN JENNY: Well, I’m glad that didn’t happen.

WHISKEY JENNY: I am really too. They do tell the truth. I didn’t feel confident that I was in good hands, I guess I should say. I was like, oh, I don’t know about this.

GIN JENNY: After the mixer incident.

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, exactly. That really shook me.

GIN JENNY: The different Vanessa Hudgenses apologize to their love interests for lying to them. And the prince is like, oh, that’s OK. And I get why the prince would be like, that’s OK. Whatever. But Kevin also seems totally unshaken by this.

WHISKEY JENNY: Totally fine. Yeah, because he’s finally out from under the thumb of that horrible drag he’s been friends with, apparently.

GIN JENNY: What’s really funny to me is that when they make the switch and everyone’s like, oh, we love each other, we’re happily ever after, et cetera, there’s no real discussion of what’s going to happen to the bakery. Like, does Kevin inherit the bakery now?

WHISKEY JENNY: Yes! I don’t know!

GIN JENNY: One would imagine he must, if Vanessa Fudgens—it’s suggested that Vanessa Fudgens is going to stay in Belgravia and be a baker in Belgravia—the logistics of which go unexplored—but also no one talks about the small business she owns in Chicago!

WHISKEY JENNY: No, I totally agree. What does the duchess do in Chicago? A lot of unanswered questions.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, a lot of unanswered—yeah, and also, what are the duchess’s passions and interests? Like what will she do in Chicago? The only thing I know about her, her interest, is she wants to be ordinary and not get photographed.

WHISKEY JENNY: Does not get photographed, and she wants to bang Kevin.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, and that’s all I know about her. But that’s not a really good reason to move to Chicago. Like, you’re going to need a plan.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I mean, those are two admirable aims. Sure, me too. But I do need a little more.

I did think it was kind of funny, when they were doing the big reveal and Kevin is a bit more gobsmacked because he is just now getting this information, and the prince has had a bit more time to process it. He’s basically just like, what is happening? And the prince is like, Lady Margaret is telling you that she loves you. And then Kevin goes, doesn’t that make you mad? Aren’t you supposed to marry her? And he’s like, no, it does not, because, as a matter of fact, I’m in love with this one. [LAUGHTER] And it was really cute. I liked it.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, I did too. I read a review that was like, oh, it’s so unrealistic that they fell in love in two days. And I was like, have you ever watched a rom com before?

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: Like, any of them? Yeah, surprisingly that’s not one of my problems with this movie.

GIN JENNY: Me neither. It’s a convention of the genre. Like, we were just talking about The Holiday. The Holiday they fall in love in like a week.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah. I do like, though, when they’re having this big public love fest—I assume they’re still on TV, because this is a reality show baking event.

GIN JENNY: They go into a back room to have the longer discussion.

WHISKEY JENNY: They go backstage, but then they come back out and the prince proposes to her in front of everyone.

GIN JENNY: Oh, that’s right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

WHISKEY JENNY: I’m sure that those baking producers were like, uh, yes! Gold!

GIN JENNY: Bingo!

[LAUGHTER]

WHISKEY JENNY: But I also liked that, during that, the rival girl glares at her sous chef that she’s been kind of mean to before, as if this is also his fault. [LAUGHTER] But then eventually she sort of smiles and is like, oh, I guess I like love. And then they get married!

GIN JENNY: Hooray, I guess!

WHISKEY JENNY: I did like that Fred is happy. Fred does a little woo when she accepts his proposal at the baking competition, as well.

GIN JENNY: Me too, because Fred is not a monster.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, exactly. Yeah. They only just now realize that.

GIN JENNY: Poor Fred.

WHISKEY JENNY: I have one sort of large general note.

GIN JENNY: OK.

WHISKEY JENNY: I feel like this movie really missed an opportunity for a classic chaos muppet/order muppet pairing.

GIN JENNY: Yes, I agree with that extremely very much.

WHISKEY JENNY: And also they just weren’t in general—like, we know nothing about Duchess Margaret. They just weren’t in general good at characterisation.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, which goes to your point that Vanessa Hudgens is more charming than this movie lets her be. When she gets a chance to do fun stuff, she’s so cute and great. And I just wanted there to be more to her character.

WHISKEY JENNY: I agree.

GIN JENNY: In both cases.

WHISKEY JENNY: In both cases, or just be consistent, at least. Because the duchess is supposed to be all duty and responsibility, but also the spontaneous, fun one, which doesn’t make any sense. And then Vanessa Fudgens is supposed to be planny, type A one, but then is teaching the prince how to have fun. What are these characters? Who are these people?

GIN JENNY: Yeah, no idea.

WHISKEY JENNY: And I still haven’t forgiven Kevin for being like, oh, you’re so planny. He’s so annoying about it. He really wants to change her. He tells Duchess Margaret that he’s been spending time with for a couple of days, I think this trip has done you a lot of good.

GIN JENNY: Ugh. Patronizing.

WHISKEY JENNY: Because you’re a totally different person, Kevin! Oh, my gosh. It really drove me crazy.

GIN JENNY: It drove me crazy, too. And I also think that it was the movie’s way of trying to explain why these two attractive people weren’t together. But I feel like they could have done that in a myriad of other ways that didn’t make them both seem like jerks. One possible thing that they could have done is have them be exes, where they tried to date for a little while and it didn’t work out. And that would also give a little more, I don’t know, give a little more oomph to Olivia’s desire for them to be together and stuff like that. But I guess in that case, I would have had the same ethical issues with what the duchess is doing. But still.

WHISKEY JENNY: I think you’re right. I think making them co-workers who don’t really know each other would be the way to go.

GIN JENNY: Yeah, that would also be great. That would be completely fine.

WHISKEY JENNY: So, anything else on The Princess Switch that you wanted to cover?

GIN JENNY: No, that’s pretty much all I had. It was fun, but like I said, I don’t think I would rewatch it.

WHISKEY JENNY: Yeah, I think I’m in the same camp.

GIN JENNY: Sob.

WHISKEY JENNY: There was the cutest little squirrel mug when they’re in one of the cafes that I’ve been trying to find, because I thought it was so cute and I want it so much. [LAUGHTER] It was a little squirrel in the snow in plaid, and it was so cute.

GIN JENNY: Aw. But no such thing exists?

WHISKEY JENNY: No, I can’t find it.

GIN JENNY: Aw. That’s so sad. Come on, Netflix. Get with the branded merchandise programming.

WHISKEY JENNY: There you go. It’d be so easy.

GIN JENNY: Well, have you watched any other holiday movies this season? Because I have not. I haven’t even watch Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer yet.

WHISKEY JENNY: The only other one that I’ve watched is, let’s see—which is not a new one, but it was an old, equally terrible one—and it was Christmas with a View, I think it’s called. There’s a girl who’s managing a restaurant at a ski resort.

GIN JENNY: OK, cool, cool.

WHISKEY JENNY: And then they bring in a celebrity chef who is like America’s hottest bachelor. He just won a chef competition, and his image was bachelor bad boy. And he’s doing a guest stint at the ski lodge.

GIN JENNY: This sounds great.

WHISKEY JENNY: And they fall in love. And she used to be a chef, and it’s her dream to reopen a restaurant, and there’s this battle between the evil corporation of the ski lodge and the small mom and pop B&Bs that are running ski B&Bs.

GIN JENNY: Aw.

WHISKEY JENNY: And the girl’s friends are really cute. Her best friend is a waitress at the ski resort. And that friend is dating and gets engaged to a city planner. And she just always refers to him as her city planner boyfriend, or City Planner Josh, or whatever his name is. They really nail home the fact that he’s a city planner. Which actually becomes a plot point, because they need to break into the city planning offices later.

I actually kind of more wanted their movie, because it’s Christmas Eve or something, and then they realize that they have to do the heist. And the girl is really excited and is like, let’s go right now! And the guy’s like, ugh. OK. [LAUGHTER] He totally just gets dragged along because he loves this waitress so much. And I was really into them as a couple.

GIN JENNY: Oh my gosh, that sounds great. Tell me the name again.

WHISKEY JENNY: I think it was Christmas with a View. It was on Netflix.

GIN JENNY: Awesome, awesome. Well, great. I’m definitely going to watch that this evening.

WHISKEY JENNY: Oh, Clive. Sorry, it’s Clive the city planner.

GIN JENNY: Oh, Clive the city planner. Well I’m glad we cleared that up. That’s important information.

WHISKEY JENNY: It is. It’s Clive. And the actor is very cute, as well.

GIN JENNY: Well, excellent. That is a great recommendation.

GIN JENNY: Well, do we have anything else?

WHISKEY JENNY: I think that’s it.

GIN JENNY: All right, well, this has been the Reading the End bookcast with the demographically similar Jennys with a special bonus holiday episode. You can visit the blog at readingtheend.com. You can follow me on Twitter @readingtheend. We are both on Goodreads as Whiskey Jenny and Gin Jenny. And you can email us at readingtheend@gmail.com. If you like what we do, you can become a podcast patron at patreon.com/readingtheend. Or, if you’re listening to us on iTunes, you can leave us a review. And until next time, happy holidays, listeners!

WHISKEY JENNY: Happy holidays!

[GLASSES CLINK]

THEME SONG: [WITH JINGLE BELLS] You don’t judge a book by its cover. Page one’s not a much better view. And shortly you’re gonna discover the middle won’t mollify you. So whether whiskey’s your go-to or you’re like my gin-drinking friend, no matter what you are imbibing, you’ll be better off in the end reading the end.